RSS

New territory (for me) in chastity

18 Feb

As I write, I am on Day 9 of being continuously locked in my chastity belt. Jalan has denied me orgasm for longer periods than this (though not dramatically so), but it is by far my longest time physically belted to date, and we’re both enjoying the unfolding of my reactions to it.

One of the changes that led to this is a modification in how it’s put on that makes it easier for me to stay clean. Previously, 3-4 days was the maximum before it would at least need to come off long enough for it and my bits to be cleaned, or the smell would become noticeable. Now, on Day 9, that apparently is no longer a factor. Like most developments in chastity, that is at best a mixed blessing! (Not really — as in most domains, anything that leaves the control to Jalan’s decisions rather than to outside factors is a good thing for us.)

So, new territory. One of the reasons Jalan hasn’t used the belt a lot to date is that she tends to prefer my reactions to simple ordered denial. More often than not, when I’m in the belt, my libido evaporates pretty quickly. No masturbation or orgasm becomes a fact of life, and I accommodate it. Jalan does have options such as teasing through the bars of the cage to keep my head in the game — HA! — but it’s not the same. In other forms of denial, though, it’s much more about my willingness — nay, my drive — to obey her. The fact that I’m obeying her by choice is much more salient more of the time, making it much tougher for me to comply than it is to simply endure the belt. And she sees the aim of chastity/denial as to keep me in a “near-constant state of desire.” I think of it as a difference between submission and bondage more generally. Her leaving things so I must stay in place is different than her ordering me to stay in place. They push different buttons in me.

And Jalan is all about knowing how to push my buttons.

This time is different, though, as the days wear on. As I wrote in my required journal on Saturday:

Since I’ve now been belted for 7 full days, with no reason to expect that  to end anytime soon, the asexual period is passing and I’m now going into full futile-guesswork overdrive.

She laughed.

And it’s true — my feeling of restriction is growing as the days go on, rather than accommodating.

I read a lot of writing by the long-term male-chastity crowd, both wearers and keyholders. We’re not that, and I don’t expect (or particularly want) us to ever be. Among other reasons, she wants me always on the edge of thinking/hoping that this might be the day I get to come.Both denial and the belt are parts of her repertoire.

One of the key parts of our D/s is that she likes/needs to know what reactions different tactics draw from me, so that she can, well, play me like a fiddle.

It works well for us.

 

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on February 18, 2013 in Chastity and denial

 

Tags: , ,

Any and all thoughts welcome

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

 
%d bloggers like this: